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In Travel

Exploring Mexico City: The Best Nightlife, Culture, and Queer Hangouts

Mexico City LGBTQ+ Travel Guide

I’ve dreamed of visiting Mexico City since I was a kid and it blows my mind that I’ve waited so long to make a trip there. MXCD is the perfect weekend trip. From Austin it was a quick 90 minute flight and a 3 night trip won’t even make a dent in your wallet. It’s got tons of museums, art, and is the right mix of glamor and grit. Here’s everything you need to know to have a gay old time.

Where to Stay

All the cool kids are staying in La Condesa, Roma Norte, or Roma Sur. I stayed in a trendy apartment between Condesa and Roma Norte. It was the perfect spot close to shops, restaurants, and parks.

Eats

Veguisima – This was the first restaurant we hit when we arrived in the city. We set out to explore and stumbled upon this tiny spot. I was halfway through my tostada before I realized everything we ordered was vegan.

Bravo Loncheria – I had plenty of amazing meals in Mexico but this was by far my favorite. When my chorizo chicken sandwich arrived, I was confused about how to eat it without utensils. It was so messy with chorizo spilling out. The server pointed to the box of plastic gloves on the table. It made for adventurous meal. I also fell in love with the soundtrack of classic American hits covered in Spanish.

Lalo – If you’ve done any research, Lalo is already on your list of restaurants. It’s super trendy and full of Americans. Their Instagram-worthy mural doesn’t hurt either. Expect a wait since most seating is at a long communal table or small bistro tables along the wall.

Azul Historico – This restaurant is all outdoor in a cool courtyard surrounded by shops. The menu features cuisine from Veracruz and is the perfect lunch spot if you’re out in the downtown area.

Drinks

Hanky Panky Bar – Hanky Panky Bar is definitely one of the most incredible experiences I’ve ever had. This is a true speakeasy with a secret location. To get in, make a reservation by messaging the bar on Facebook. They’ll give you some general location information and it’s up to you to find the exact spot. #NoSpoilers but we exited the bar through a fridge.

La Nuclear – This is a boisterous dive bar that serves pulque. Pulque is a creamy alcoholic drink made from the maguey plant and comes in a few different flavors. We tried piñon and piña colada. You should definitely stop in for one.

Cabaretito Fusion – When we set out for the gay bars, I was adamant that we go to a cumbia club. I grew up dancing cumbia and seeing gay couples dancing cumbia was a dream to me. There are two main rooms here, the smaller front room plays cumbia while the larger back room plays top 40 hits. If you want to fit in, most people are drinking 40s of Indio or a cocktail in a large styrofoam cup with red sauce on the rim (maybe chamoy?). Entrance is 70 pesos and comes with one beer ticket.

Tom’s Leather Bar – I hope it’s no secret that I love goth. Tom’s was described on many blogs as actually a gay goth bar and not your typical leather bar. You can’t even imagine how much this thrilled me. I built a whole night of bar hopping around getting to Tom’s at what I estimated would be the busiest. Little did I know, it’s just a leather bar. Like really a leather bar. About 75% of the space is dark room. Entry is 185 pesos and comes with 2 drink tickets.

Kinky Bar – We were about to call it a night when we decided to hit one last bar. Kinky Bar is definitely more like your typical gay bar and probably my favorite. There are two floors with the first being split between karaoke rooms and a dance floor with more traditional Mexican music. The second floor plays standard dance music and top 40 hits. Oh, and expect some of the most beautiful bartenders you’ve ever seen. Entry is 60 pesos but sadly comes with no drinks. 

Sights

Historical Sites – El Palacio Nacional, Templo Mayor, Zocalo, Catedral Metropolitana – These sites are all essentially in the same block. I highly recommend Templo Mayor and the palace. Get there as early as you can. We arrived before noon and had no problem getting in but leaving was like being in a herd of cattle.

Teotihuacan – Take a nice day trip to climb some pyramids. You can take the subway to the Autobuses del Norte station and be there in about an hour. It’s pretty fun and you can see all of the pyramids plus the museum in about 3 hours.

Museo Jumex – There are so many museums in Mexico City that it’s impossible to see them all in one weekend. We stopped into the Jumex collection because it’s slightly on the smaller side and was easy to squeeze into our day.

Biblioteca Vasconcelos – This library is one of the most Instagrammable places I’ve ever been. We popped in for a quick walk around and took a few photos but you might like to wander upstairs and read for a bit.


Museo Frida Kahlo –

I’ve already got flight alerts set up so I can make a quick getaway to Mexico City any weekend.

See the Gays & Confused Travel Guides to discover more queer friendly travel tips.

May 16, 2017
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In Travel

A Weekend in Madrid: The Ultimate Queer-Friendly Travel Guide

Madrid holds a special place in my heart, always calling me back time and again with its exciting energy and welcoming atmosphere. I’ve had the privilege of visiting the city a few times and uncovered a few hidden gems and embraced its lively queer scene. Here are my suggestions for a weekend in the Spanish capital.

Where to Stay

Chueca is the gayborhood and the surrounding area is booming with trendy bars, restaurants, and shops. If you’re looking to make the most of your stay, you’ll want to make sure to find a spot nearby.

Eats

Tapas tour – One of the most exciting things we did in Madrid was a tapas tour. Most places offer a free tapas plate when you order a drink. We started at Cerveceria Cervantes and basically went door to door from there having a beer or glass of wine at each stop.  

El Tigre – 7 euros bought us two glasses of red wine and a giant plate of assorted tapas. Sure it looked like a plate of scraps, but it was one of the most affordable meals of my life.

Museo del Jamón – On my previous trips to Madrid, I’d seen this chain but never stopped in. The name is so hilarious to me and I’d been dying to check it out. I finally got my chance when we stopped in for a glass of wine and some tapas.

Cocina del Desierto – After several meals of tapas, I was eager to revisit some of the Moroccan cuisine we had in Granada. It’s a cozy spot with Moroccan textiles and decor.

Antorcha Cafe – This trendy spot serves delicious gourmet burgers. There’s limited seating and it’s popular, but luckily you can grab a seat at the bar.

Lamucca de Pez – This restaurant is spacious and modern with plenty of seating at communal tables. They serve up pizzas, salads, and other Mediterranean fare. It’s another popular spot, so get there early or make a reservation to avoid a wait.

Chocolateria San Gines – Everyone knows I have the biggest sweet tooth and so of course I was ecstatic about having chocolate y churros in Spain. Every time we walked by San Gines, there was a line out the door. Luckily, it’s open all night and sweets are the perfect ending to an evening of drinking. But don’t be like me and maybe share your order with someone(s).

Drinks

Pub Rimmel – On the night we visited, the club played an all Rihanna soundtrack and offered up a super drink special: Each cocktail came with a shot of your choice. Can’t beat it.  

Gris – This queer friendly bar blasts plenty of Euro 90s indie hits. I can’t express enough how much I love grunge.

Cazador – Another queer friendly bar, this was one of my favorite drinking spots. It was crowded with hipster homos and played plenty of pop music.

LL Bar – This was my favorite of the traditional gay bars. We were squeezed into the bar for an amazing drag show. For a few euros, the queens will even let you sing with them.

Sights

Puerta del Sol – Madrid reminds me so much of New York and I’d say Puerta del Sol is like Times Square. It’s a busy plaza surrounded by shops and restaurants.

Palacio Real – Spain has one of the largest palaces in Europe. It’s so majestic you definitely have to make a stop here.

Museo del Prado – I’ve visited Madrid twice before and I’m always happy to stop into this museum. It has one of the best fine art collections featuring classical works from all over Europe.

Buen Retiro Park – On our last day in Madrid, we went for an afternoon stroll through the park. It’s a popular hangout for locals. There’s a small lake with rowboats for rent and entertaining street performers.

Palacio de Cristal – Buen Retiro Park also is home to a large glass building that houses some art installations.

Caixa Forum – The vertical garden at Caixa Forum is one of the best Instagram spots in Madrid. Get there early to avoid waiting for other visitors to clear some space.

From savoring tapas to dancing the night away, a weekend in Madrid is like no other. I’m sure it won’t be long before the city beckons me again! Until next time!

See the Gays & Confused Travel Guides to discover more queer friendly travel tips.

March 28, 2017
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The Gays & Confused Monthly Playlist

Dive into the soundwaves with our monthly Spotify playlist! 🎶 Jam-packed with tunes from queer artists and LGBTQ+ icons, this collection is your passport to a sonic celebration of the rainbow. From disco anthems to hidden gems, every month we’ll update this playlist to provide a curated soundtrack for your journey. Hit play and let the beats speak louder than words!

November 27, 2021
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In Entertainment/ Life

Fotos y Recuerdos: The Story of My First Diva

Diva Wednesday: Selena

No quiero saber de más problemas ya

There I was, a first grader in Eagle Pass, Texas. Riding in my dad’s pick up truck, living dangerously without the safety of a seatbelt, listening to his soundtrack of Tejano hits. Grupo Mazz. La Mafia. And my favorite, the reigning queen of cumbia, Selena y los Dinos. At this age, I obviously had no concept of the latest trends but Ven Conmigo was my everything. My number one track was No Quiero Saber with its dance-pop vibes, a departure from the polkas and cumbias on the rest of the album. “No quiero saber de mas problemas ya.” “Play the song where she says ‘ja’!” I would demand, impersonating the hard j sound she sang on the track. It amused me since I pronounced the word with a y, as it’s spelled.

Not growing up fully bilingual, I was often out of place in my hometown where Spanish was the dominant language. And in my own home, we listened to Spanish language music and watched Spanish language TV. My Spanish was terrible and my vocabulary was so minimal, it often felt like these pop cultural treasures were not my own. Because I couldn’t understand, I often wanted to listen to anything other than Tejano or cumbia. Selena y los Dinos was the sole exception.

This is how my identity split in two and never the two should meet. A concept every queer person comes to know too well. My Mexican-self watched telenovelas, listened to cumbia, and ate tacos. My American-self dominated my conversation and my thinking. And here was Selena, casually dropping contemporary English language pop tracks on traditional Spanish language LPs. A female icon in a male-dominated genre. Singing in Spanish when she mostly spoke English. A fellow Texan piecing together her Mexican and American identities. And that’s how the universe introduced me to my very first diva.

¿Tú que creías, tú que creías?

Que te ibas a encontrar

Un amor mejor que el mío

When I heard that my parents were going to the Selena dance, I was ecstatic. For the uninitiated, the Tejano scene doesn’t do concerts. They do dances. You don’t go to a theater to sit and watch a show. You go to a dance hall or nightclub to baila sin parar while the band performs. Cumbias are danced in a circle, almost in a follow the leader formation. It’s a beautiful experience that seems to be missing from most music scenes, especially in the world of celebrity DJs where too often the crowd idly watches a barely-there performance rather than experiencing the music.

You can guess that a smoky dance hall is clearly no place for a child. And despite my pleading, my parents wouldn’t entertain the idea of me coming to the Selena dance. I refused to back down from my demands. My diva was on my turf and I deserved to go. I begged. I pleaded. I threw my own things in anger. I had already picked out my outfit. Dark wranglers, my best western shirt, and cowboy boots. My dad could buy me a new cowboy hat in Mexico, anything for Selenas.

Spoiler alert: I spent the night at my grandparents’ house watching black and white Disney films and eating delivery pizza until I passed out. The next morning my mom gifted me a button with a picture of the Entre Mi Mundo album cover. At the end of the night, my parents were standing at the front of the crowd when Selena, who had been wearing a denim jacket with a few pieces of flare, took off the pin from her jacket and threw it into the crowd. My mom reached out and caught it. I cherished that pin for my entire childhood. Never questioning my mom’s version of events and relaying it every chance I had. Because it happened. Just. Like. That.

Y es todo lo que me queda de tu amor

Solo fotos y recuerdos

By the time Amor Prohibido was released, Selena mania was everywhere. Bidi Bidi Bom Bom was played to death and I’m not always sure I can listen to it to this day. Selena y los Dinos had become the soundtrack of every backyard BBQ and school dance. I had my own copy of Amor Prohibido on cassette tape and played it over and over again on my walkman. Walking through the playground, I imagined myself in a white ruffled shirt, leather jacket, and hoop earrings. What? I was a budding homosexual and this was my dream.

It was the middle of the afternoon when our school’s secretary burst into our classroom. She was hysterical and sobbing incoherently. “They killed Selena!” she ran down the hallway to the next room to make the announcement. We looked around at each other in confusion. “What?” After our lesson was over, we were allowed to listen to the radio. Selena Quintanilla Perez had died.

I’d never lost someone I cared so much for in such a violent way. But Selena was a celebrity and just an image in photos and a voice on cassettes. It was a numbing feeling that I didn’t understand. Our entire community was at a loss. My sister and I collected every memento to mark the occasion. The commemorative issue of People magazine. The rapidly published biographies. The t-shirts memorializing la reina. We made a pilgrimage to the Selena boutique in San Antonio and bought baseball caps with Selena’s logo. I took in all things Selena. Spending my afternoons reading the countless articles written about her life and impact. As I learned that Selena herself spoke very little Spanish, I felt an even deeper connection to the diva.

To this day there’s a story from a young fan that I carry with me as her experience seemed to reflect mine so well. In memorializing Selena, she said that Selena gave her pride in her culture. Before discovering Selena’s music, she felt ashamed of speaking Spanish and being Mexican. It was Selena and her music that helped her appreciate her own culture.

Even though I grew up in a community that just so happens to be split by an international border, that is overwhelmingly Mexican, a sense of self-shame still exists. To live on the American side meant you were better than your neighbors. Getting into the identity crisis of being culturally and physically Mexican while trying to feel superior to the Mexican citizen is a topic for another day but Selena brought Mexican-American culture to the brink of the mainstream. Unapologetically straddling two worlds in cowboy boots and a bustier while modernizing traditional Tejano music with 90s dance pop. Never had I felt so allowed to be so Mexican in America. Yes, you can have two cultures.

Como la flor

Con tanto amor

Me diste tú

Se marchitó

The filming of the Selena movie was so hotly anticipated in south Texas. We counted down the days until its release. Finally, not only would our queen be given the silver screen treatment she deserved, but the world would know her just as we had. For me, the movie itself exists as its own marker in my personal history. Aside from the story, I’m deeply attached to the rural south Texas landscape and cultural spaces of my home that are etched in cinematic glory for the outside world.

Edward James Olmos lamenting that Mexican-Americans have to work twice as hard. To be more Mexican than the Mexicans and more American than the Americans. Never had someone vocalized my own frustrations so perfectly. A sentiment that rings true to this day. “Me siento muy…excited!” and “Anything for Selenas!” are deeply embedded into pop culture at a time when her music has come back in vogue and numerous artists have paid their homage.

Over the years, many other divas have entered my life and made their mark, but never again would I have an icon like Selena. Representation can truly affect the place you see for yourself in the world. Had Selena’s foray into the mainstream pop world been realized, I can’t help but wonder the deeper implications for Mexican-Americans and other Latinx groups. To have a pop culture icon that validates your bi-cultural experience and your background, to prove that your existence isn’t exotic. That yes, you can speak two languages, embrace multiple customs, and be celebrated for it. And more importantly for me, you can be Mexican and American and unapologetically Texan.

Es el mas dulce recuerdo de mi vida.

February 28, 2019
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In Travel

Gay Guide to New Orleans: Your Essential LGBTQ+ Travel Companion

It’s become my tradition to take a New Year’s Trip with friends, preferably something relaxed so we have time to bond and reconnect. I’ve been to New Orleans before and done plenty of tourist things, so it seemed like a great option for a mix of fun and relaxation. This time around, I also did very little planning and let my friend Alex call the shots. 

Where to Stay

In my previous visit, I’d spent nearly my entire trip in the French Quarter. I knew I wanted to explore more of the city and stay a good distance from that scene. We chose to rent an adorable house in the Lower Garden District. This area is a short distance to plenty of attractions but quiet enough for relaxing at home. While it was pretty chilly during our visit, we did brave the cold a few times to walk to the French Quarter.

Eats

I’m gonna be honest, this trip was mostly planned around eating. We booked reservations at several places and arrived armed with lists of New Orleans’ best.

My first New Orleans meal was lunch at Shaya. Order some champagne and share plates of tahini, hummus, and of course brussels.

For New Year’s Eve, we wanted to celebrate in a big way by getting dinner at the type of restaurant we wouldn’t normally go to. We chose Emeril’s Delmonico, which has a much older sensibility of class and elegance. We also got some of the best service I’ve ever had at a restaurant. It was fancy, y’all.

Domilise’s Po-Boy & Bar is a must for indulgent Cajun sandwiches. You should know they’re enormous. The diner also gets pretty crowded, so you’ll have to take a number and wait a while. Luckily, their bar is stocked with awesome craft beers.

Butcher served up some meaty bbq sandwiches, which hit the spot on a cold day. Plus, I needed something to soak up the booze. Done and done. 

My favorite meal of the trip was actually our last dinner at Coquette. You can expect some amazing modern Southern food and I highly recommend getting a bottle of Southern Belle Syrah for your meal.

Drinks

One thing about New Orleans that blows my mind is the number of gay bars in a city this size. And of course I wanted to go to all of them and experience every scene in our community. We spent the better part of our NYE at Oz, which is the obvious and more traditional gay club. 700 Club is a more relaxed but still lively bar and was one of my favorite spots. Corner Pocket is an amusing cross between a divey pub and a strip club. Mag’s 940 hosts music and variety shows but was pretty slow the night we stopped in. The bartender was super friendly and gave us some popcorn. I’m not sure if that’s a regular thing but I like to think it was special to us. We also checked out one of New Orleans’ more debaucherous venues, Phoenix Bar. I like to say nothing shocks me, but the dark room upstairs literally kept me wide eyed all night. It’s a part of gay culture I’m glad to see still exists and stays away from the mainstream.

Shop

Aside from stuffing my face, I spent quite a bit of money at various shops around town.

Zéle Market is a multivendor indoor marketplace. I picked up some amazing candles by Mad Darling and I’m completely obsessed with them. But I really wish I’d picked up some furniture, too.

Defend New Orleans has plenty of edgy NOLA inspired wares and provisions. Grab one of their graphic tees for a subtle souvenir of your visit. The Join DNO tee was my favorite. Get yourself one and let’s be twins.

While wandering around Frenchmen Street, stumble into Frenchmen Art Market for an interesting mix of arts and crafts.

Sights

There are plenty of museums and tourist sights to see, but this trip I decided to focus less on those. 

No matter where I go, I definitely want to see good art. New Orleans Museum of Art made for an inspiring afternoon. Their floor featuring Mesoamerican and other native art was especially intriguing. 

I have a soft spot for goth, but New Orleans cemeteries are really beautiful and definitely a must if you’re visiting town.

I had so much fun in New Orleans and I’ll hopefully be taking some more weekend trips there in the future.

See the Gays & Confused Travel Guides to discover more queer friendly travel tips.

January 25, 2016
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